Holy Crap That Was Wack! or How I Wasted an Entire Day on Some Bullshit

So my company did that "summit" on Tuesday. It was balls because of the following:

1. After prefacing the slew of presentations on the agenda by saying that they won't be boring ass lectures on shit you don't care about, it was a bunch of boring assed lectures on shit you don't care about.
2. I had cramps
3. After prepping for the stupid presentation, it was nothing in the realm of what we thought it would be
4. My team wuz robbed!

The only non ass sucking portion of the whole thing was the keynote speaker who was this dude who climbed Mt. Everest with a blind guy. I could have listened to his stories all day, but of course they had to piss all over that too.

So we did our thing, complete with spastic dancing behind a screen to U2 like in the iPod commercials (yeah I know). Afterwards, after all of the presentations were done Management (i.e. the skeevy CEO) went on to trash everyone. Nice huh? Never mind that we only had one hour to put our presentation together with friggin cameras in our faces and mics hangin down over our heads. Oh I didn't mention the cameras, well yes there were cameras. It was my company's crap ass ode to The Apprentice. Ick! Anyway, after the anus tearing ended and we were the only ones not totally trashed as hard as the other teams, it was on to the party!

Booze, booze everywhere and a band! *Sigh* They reminded me why I'm having a DJ for my wedding. Nothing sucks harder than a super crappy with cheese on top version of Crazy in Love, except for maybe Beyonce herself. It also included Jay's verse. Yeah, very bad.

So finally after all the boozing has occurred they announce the winner of the 5K that had to be spent all in one night with their team and it's.......Team Abercombie & Fitch, lead by Asshat #1. Yeah. I'm pretty sure I let out a very loud drunken WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT! They got trashed the hardest and their fucking presentation's pages weren't even in order. And what's more I lost to the Asshat! That plaid wearing ass splunker! Balls! And the buzz was that my team had it on lock.

Fuckers.

Anyhoo, there was much more booze and a jam session with the CEO on drums. Ick! And of course there was the afterparty where there was more booze. I had at least 8 cosmos between the party and the afterparty.

Did I mention that all of this was on Tuesday night? So needless to say I was hurt on Wednesday when I rolled in at like 9:30. You could hear a pin drop in the office because that's how hungover everyone was. I actually lasted the entire day, but I can't remember doing any actual work.

On Thursday, I was mentally incapable of going to work so I didn't. I stayed in bed all day part of it with the Zeenman since he had the day off. I slept off and on all day and of course could not sleep that night so I was crap on a cracker at work today.

But I'm basically that everyday at work. My head hurts so I think I'll lie down and then head to H, Formally Known as Squatter's karaoke B-day party to make an ass of myself.

Later.............