I seem to be in one of two moods these days. Snarky or slightly teary. I hate to admit the teary part because I am superwoman. A warrior who doesn't cry. But lately, I feel like I'm on the verge all the time. Unfortunately it's always in random places like the train and at work.
I can really do without it. I know where the tearyness is coming from. Soon it will be the 3rd anniversary of my Sands M's death. Memorial Day weekend to be exactly. How odd yet fitting that it's Memorial Day weekend? Anyway, I just get emotional and sad every year. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever feel normal. Really normal, ever again. The pain is like a dull ache now but it's still there along side the pain that's there from my grandmother's passing.
*Taking a deep breath* I have to shake this creeping feeling of sadness off. I just don't have time to keep mourning. There's just no time.
As for the snarkiness, it's NYC. Plain and simple, this city is getting to me and I must get out. Thankfully, I've got the opportunity to do that very thing for LW's wedding. I'm off to hopefully sunny West Palm Beach for what is sure to be a fantastic wedding and some serious rest. It will also take my mind off my Sands. So double upgrade!
Meanwhile, I'm going to try to remain peace loving in a city full of fucking nimrods. I vow not to:
1. Shove stupid motherfuckers on the train who block the doors as you try to enter & exit
2. Throw elbows at cats who don't know the social contract
3. Cuss anyone out
4. Throw stuff at idiots
5. Kick anyone
I'm going to try really, really hard. Pray for me.
Later.........
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